Hello, this is Ismail Siddiky from Europe Diary. Here I am with another set of tips and tricks about Portugal. If you want to visit Lisbon for the first time, this blog will be super helpful for you. If you visit Lisbon, here are 10 things you should not do. I’ve consulted with my good friend, Marco, who is from Lisbon, to give us the top 10 things not to do when you visit Lisbon if you don’t want to get ripped off or get yourself into some hot water while in Lisbon.
1. Avoid Buying from Street Vendors
In Lisbon, there are a lot of hustlers on the streets trying to sell you drugs, tours, and many other things. Don’t buy anything from any of them. If you’re trying to buy drugs on the streets, just don’t. They are not selling drugs, and it is definitely not worth it. You will probably end up smoking or snorting something that is not drugs at all, and it might be dangerous. Do not buy anything from the people on the streets, and if they talk to you on the streets, just say no thank you and politely walk past them. This is one of the more annoying things about visiting Lisbon when you’re in the more touristy areas, where people approach you, asking you for drugs, everywhere you go, especially when you are closer to the river. This seems to happen a lot. You might be a younger person looking to take some MDMA and dance at the clubs or an older retiree trying to smoke a joint. Don’t buy it from the people on the streets. Trust me on this.
2. Skip Dining in the Baixa Area
These restaurants are complete tourist traps that will rip you off. Usually, they are not owned by Portuguese people, and the cuisine is absolutely terrible. It’s almost three or four times the cost of a traditional Portuguese restaurant, and you usually have people from different parts of the world that are just ripping it off and creating this tourist trap. A lot of people come to Portugal and say, “Oh, I don’t really like Portuguese cuisine,” when they’ve only had food in the tourist trap areas. They’ve never really had Portuguese food at all. So avoid any of the restaurants in the Baixa area, and you should be good.
3. Stay Clear of Bairro Alto Bars
Bairro Alto is like the party central place with all of the bars. There’s tons of people at night, and it can get a little bit dodgy and a little bit crazy. There are many bars that offer to give you a shot if you come in, and they’ll give you the first shot free. Heads up: the shot is literally just some sugar water with maybe half alcohol of something really cheap and terrible. It’s definitely not even worth taking it for free. They’re just trying to get you into the bar to get you drunk and to get you to buy a bunch of drinks. It’s definitely not worth it, and if you see a bar trying to give you a shot to come in, run like hell because it’s definitely not worth it. There are plenty of great bars that are hard to get into because they’re great bars and don’t need to give you a shot to come into them. So don’t be stupid and don’t get lured into the bars by a free shot of alcohol because it’s not good alcohol anyway.
4. Don’t Ride Tuk-Tuks
Not only are the tuk-tuks very dangerous, but they are a complete rip-off. These are not something native to Lisbon, and this is not something the locals do often. It’s just a way for people to completely rip you off and give you this tour and charge you ungodly amounts to tell you things about the city that are very obvious and that you can find out on your phone. Definitely just avoid the tuk-tuks. Ubers are really affordable to get you around the city, and you can get out and walk around and see everything that you want to see.
5. Don’t Speak Spanish
Speaking Spanish is totally fine if you are from Spain, as Portuguese people will understand you. But you will look like a total idiot if you say “gracias” to people in Portugal, and it’s obvious that you are an English speaker. It’s better just to speak English as it will be a lot more respectable, and the Portuguese people will like you a lot more. You just look like a total douchebag if you say “gracias” like you haven’t done any research at all and don’t know that they don’t really speak Spanish in Portugal—they speak Portuguese. So before you say “gracias,” say “obrigado” for a man and “obrigada” for a woman.
6. Don’t Assume Everyone Speaks English
Most people do speak English in Portugal. It’s the most common language spoken other than Portuguese. So, English is a very safe bet while traveling around Portugal, but not everyone speaks it. So don’t be that guy who is upset because someone is not speaking English. Learning some Portuguese goes a long way when visiting Portugal or any of the cities within it. So before you go, learn some phrases like “thank you,” “hello,” and “excuse me.” These will get you far. It will definitely go a long way with the Portuguese, and they will really appreciate it.
7. Avoid Boarding Tram 28 at Martim Moniz
This is the starting point of the tram, and there are likely tons of people, and it will take hours to get on the tram. Here’s a little hack: you can get on at any of the stops afterward, but the tram will probably be pretty full. If you go to the very last stop, Campo Ourique, you can jump on the tram where nobody is on it and ride it back the other direction. I would highly recommend doing this if you want to ride on Tram 28 but avoid all the busy crowds. This is also a place where pickpockets target some of their victims.
8. Skip the Santa Justa Elevator
It is a huge scam. Instead of spending five euros to ride the elevator up and down, just walk around. If you come around from the other side, you can enter across a bridge and walk up the tower for free. So do not pay five euros to ride the elevator unless you really just love elevators and you really want to be in it. But I would say it’s a massive rip-off. Just walk around, take the land bridge, go up the tower, and see the same view for free.
9. Don’t Buy Sardines from Tourist Shops
Everywhere in Lisbon, you will see these sardine circus stores that have bright colors that attract foreigners. This is one of Portugal’s biggest tourist traps. All of the sardines in these stores are marked up four times the price that you can buy them for in a local grocery store or a cannery. Save yourself some money, and if you want to bring some sardines back to your family, just go into a grocery store and buy a local brand like Bom Sucesso or something like that. Don’t waste your money getting sold these sardines that are 60 euros a can or something crazy. It is just a complete rip-off.
10. Wear Appropriate Footwear
Lisbon can be a very slippery place, folks. I came out of a place once on a rainy day and slipped and fell right on my arse. I was wearing very nice athletic tennis shoes at the time, so nobody is safe. Be very careful and make sure you wear your best traction shoes when in Lisbon. You will thank me later. High heels and sandals are not going to be fun for a day in Lisbon. You’ll thank me later.
